Bianca Gascoigne is this week set to add a little much-needed drama to the latest series of The X Factor as she auditions in front of the judges in a bid to prove she isn't just… er… um. Well she was on Celebrity Love Island, once.
And Bianca clearly wanted to prove the doubters – all of them, absolutely every one – wrong, while at the same time add to the family history of chart success first achieved when stepdad Paul scored a 1990 hit with Fog on the Tyne (Revisited).
But yeah: no. Gary Barlow wasn't having any of that.
Surprise
"I love singing and hopefully they can see that when I walk on stage, you know that I really do care and that I'm going to be nervous because it means so much to me," said the DJ and model ahead of her audition.
Once up there she did the whole 'yes, it's me, it's Bianca Gascoigne from off the telly sometimes' routine that she must have to do everywhere she goes, before giving the judges a blast of Mary J Blige's I'm Going Down.
Not very good
But the judges – including usual suspects Gary Barlow and Tulisa as well as unusual suspect Rita Ora – were left unimpressed. And suspect.
"What the other 25-year-olds have is that they've been singing all their lives, seriously singing," said Gary, seriously. "At 25, you should be a lot better than that." It is probably a good time to mention that Bianca is 25.
And she has packed a number of reality TV shows into those 25 little years. As well as appearing on the series of Celebrity Love Island that made her name, Bianca has also featured on Celebrity Coach Trip and Snog, Marry, Avoid. Yeah. What reality TV shows have you been on? Didn't think so.
Sadly, Bianca fans will need to wait until her next reality TV show appearance to see more of Miss Gascoigne – The X Factor judges turned her down. A savvy media veteran like Bianca might have said "I'm going down" as they did that, but she didn't, she just looked sad. Next time, Bianca. Next time.
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